# VeloVanity

## Pages
- [Home](https://www.velovanity.com/)
- [Bike Culture](https://www.velovanity.com/bike-culture)
- [Contact](https://www.velovanity.com/contact)
- [Fitness](https://www.velovanity.com/fitness)
- [Gear](https://www.velovanity.com/gear)
- [Other Places](https://www.velovanity.com/other-places)
- [Sojourn](https://www.velovanity.com/sojourn)

## Blog Posts
- [MVDP](https://www.velovanity.com/home/mvdp)
- [Bananas and Seats](https://www.velovanity.com/home/bananas-and-seats)
- [Skid-tracks and the Childish Brain](https://www.velovanity.com/home/skid-tracks-and-the-childish-brain)
- [If you are Lucky enough to have a bike, you are lucky enough.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/if-you-are-lucky-enough-to-have-a-bike-you-are-lucky-enough)
- [Jersey Pockets and Cargo Shorts](https://www.velovanity.com/home/jersey-pockets-and-cargo-shorts)
- [Edgy is when you feel you may break it.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/edgy-is-when-you-feel-you-may-break-it)
- [The 606 and The Zombie Infection](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-606-and-the-zombie-infection)
- [Mind The Gap](https://www.velovanity.com/home/mind-the-gap)
- [Cycling The Ocean](https://www.velovanity.com/home/cycling-the-ocean)
- [Dead Letter Writing](https://www.velovanity.com/home/dead-letter-writing)
- [Leonardo da Vinci Bike Hoax](https://www.velovanity.com/home/leonardo-da-vinci-bike-hoax)
- [Desert Sojourn Joshua Tree Part One](https://www.velovanity.com/home/desert-sojourn-joshua-tree-part-one)
- ["Gravel Bikes" -- The New "Hard-Tail" arghh!](https://www.velovanity.com/home/gravel-bikes-the-new-hard-tail-arghh)
- [Your Virtual Life on the Bike](https://www.velovanity.com/home/your-virtual-life-on-the-bike)
- [Two Sticks - No Fire](https://www.velovanity.com/home/two-sticks-no-fire)
- [Cross and Inspiration](https://www.velovanity.com/home/cross-and-inspiration)
- [Unplugged (Gadgets, The snake oil of a Good Ride).](https://www.velovanity.com/home/unplugged-gadgets-the-snake-oil-of-a-good-ride)
- [The Ocean Doesn't Want me Today](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-ocean-doesnt-want-me-today)
- [The Unsung Elegance of Cold Snot](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-unsung-elegance-of-cold-snot)
- [Nirvana by Charles Bukowski](https://www.velovanity.com/home/nirvana-by-charles-bukowski)
- [Specialized S-Works Shit Sandwich](https://www.velovanity.com/home/specialized-s-works-shit-sandwich)
- [je ne sais quoi](https://www.velovanity.com/home/je-ne-sais-quoi)
- [Cold as Shit](https://www.velovanity.com/home/cold-as-shit)
- [Beautiful Design](https://www.velovanity.com/home/beautiful-design)
- [To Disappear](https://www.velovanity.com/home/to-disappear)
- [Blind-Spot](https://www.velovanity.com/home/blind-spot)
- [The Meltdown](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-meltdown)
- [Cruel Bitch](https://www.velovanity.com/home/cruel-bitch)
- [That Retired Super-Hero, Pee Bee & Jay](https://www.velovanity.com/home/that-retired-super-hero-pee-bee-jay)
- [The New Old Shit](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-new-old-shit)
- [Tubeless Tires. Totally Tubular?](https://www.velovanity.com/home/tubeless-tires-totally-tubular)
- [Ceci n'est pas une bicyclette](https://www.velovanity.com/home/ceci-nest-pas-une-bicyclette)
- ["There's This Certain Slant of Light"](https://www.velovanity.com/home/theres-this-certain-slant-of-light)
- [National Bike Month & Carbon Footprint](https://www.velovanity.com/home/national-bike-month-carbon-footprint)
- [When you sit idly by](https://www.velovanity.com/home/when-you-sit-idly-by)
- [They Promised us Jet-Packs](https://www.velovanity.com/home/they-promised-us-jet-packs)
- [The End All Be All](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-end-all-be-all)
- [But this One Goes to Eleven](https://www.velovanity.com/home/but-this-one-goes-to-eleven)
- [That Comfortable Life](https://www.velovanity.com/home/that-comfortable-life)
- [Fake Meat & the Impossible Bike](https://www.velovanity.com/home/fake-meat-the-impossible-bike)
- [The DarkSide of El Capitan](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-darkside-of-el-capitan)
- [Oh the Places You Should Go.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/oh-the-places-you-should-go)
- [Nature vs Netflix, Our Quest for an "F"](https://www.velovanity.com/home/nature-vs-netflix-our-quest-for-an-f)
- [Elegy for a Wheel (as bad prose goes)](https://www.velovanity.com/home/elegy-for-a-wheel-as-bad-prose-goes)
- [Franken Bike](https://www.velovanity.com/home/franken-bike)
- [Legalized Pot (holes)](https://www.velovanity.com/home/legalized-pot-holes)
- [Apocalypse Tao](https://www.velovanity.com/home/apocalypse-tao)
- [Black Swans and Vanishing Puppies](https://www.velovanity.com/home/black-swans-and-vanishing-puppies)
- [Detention, After School Ends Forever](https://www.velovanity.com/home/detention-after-school-ends-forever)
- [(if) The Lysol Doesn't Kill You](https://www.velovanity.com/home/if-the-lysol-doesnt-kill-you)
- [Rainbows Ham and Unicorns](https://www.velovanity.com/home/rainbows-ham-and-unicorns)
- [A Bike Maker's Bad Math](https://www.velovanity.com/home/a-bike-makers-bad-math)
- [Orwellian Ode to the Circle Jerks c. 1984](https://www.velovanity.com/home/orwellian-ode-to-the-circle-jerks-c-1984)
- [They Eat Their Own](https://www.velovanity.com/home/they-eat-their-own)
- [A Clockwork Boris](https://www.velovanity.com/home/a-clockwork-boris)
- [Bread Butter and Fishing](https://www.velovanity.com/home/bread-butter-and-fishing)
- [Standing on a Beech](https://www.velovanity.com/home/standing-on-a-beech)
- [Unbroken](https://www.velovanity.com/home/unbroken)
- [A Window -- Dead Kennedys Hip Hop Hard Country](https://www.velovanity.com/home/a-window-dead-kennedys-hip-hop-hard-country)
- [Mother Magic](https://www.velovanity.com/home/mother-magic)
- [VHS or COVID?](https://www.velovanity.com/home/vhs-or-covid)
- [IN THIS FUNK TOGETHER](https://www.velovanity.com/home/in-this-funk-together)
- [Extraordinary Pants in Candyland -- B4 Lance Went Postal.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/extraordinary-pants-in-candyland-b4-lance-went-postal)
- [Found Money & The Fucking Rules](https://www.velovanity.com/home/found-money-the-fucking-rules)
- [Elegiac Feelings Ampersand.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/elegiac-feelings-ampersand)
- [For The New Kids](https://www.velovanity.com/home/for-the-new-kids)
- [In Full Effect](https://www.velovanity.com/home/in-full-effect)
- [Without Precedent, Silence Fell](https://www.velovanity.com/home/without-precedent-silence-fell)
- [Pneumatic Woes](https://www.velovanity.com/home/pneumatic-woes)
- [Shit from Shinoma](https://www.velovanity.com/home/shit-from-shinoma)
- [Satan Is My Motor](https://www.velovanity.com/home/satan-is-my-motor)
- [Plush Toy](https://www.velovanity.com/home/plush-toy)
- [Frigidaire's Frenemy Freon](https://www.velovanity.com/home/frigidaires-frenemy-freon)
- [A Conversation with Gen P](https://www.velovanity.com/home/a-conversation-with-gen-p)
- [More than this?](https://www.velovanity.com/home/more-than-this)
- [Cruel Bananarama Summer Fades](https://www.velovanity.com/home/cruel-bananarama-summer-fades)
- [Its They Them MF'ers](https://www.velovanity.com/home/its-they-them-mfers)
- [...Is (IPA) Hipster for DumbAss.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/is-ipa-hipster-for-dumbass)
- [StrangeGlove: How I quit rubber and learned to love COVID](https://www.velovanity.com/home/strangeglove-how-i-quit-rubber-and-learned-to-love-covid)
- [Sympathy for the Devil](https://www.velovanity.com/home/sympathy-for-the-devil)
- [Fresh Princess](https://www.velovanity.com/home/fresh-princess)
- [Be Good to Your Mother](https://www.velovanity.com/home/be-good-to-your-mother)
- [Double Super Secret Probation](https://www.velovanity.com/home/double-super-secret-probation)
- [Same as It Ever Was](https://www.velovanity.com/home/same-as-it-ever-was)
- [Liz Cheney Wins the GOP’s Manhood Contest](https://www.velovanity.com/home/liz-cheney-wins-the-gops-manhood-contest)
- [Rule #5: Harden The Fuck Up](https://www.velovanity.com/home/rule-5-harden-the-fuck-up)
- [Survivor Guilt](https://www.velovanity.com/home/survivor-guilt)
- [Track-Standing v.1](https://www.velovanity.com/home/track-standing-v1)
- [UFO's and Barbie Dolls](https://www.velovanity.com/home/ufos-and-barbie-dolls)
- [What to do with Dad?](https://www.velovanity.com/home/what-to-do-with-dad)
- [Okacim's Razor](https://www.velovanity.com/home/okacims-razor)
- [He's Going the Distance...](https://www.velovanity.com/home/hes-going-the-distance)
- [A Good Egg](https://www.velovanity.com/home/a-good-egg)
- [Straight-Up Lifted.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/straight-up-lifted)
- [Failure As An Option](https://www.velovanity.com/home/failure-as-an-option)
- [Gastro Schlub](https://www.velovanity.com/home/gastro-schlub)
- [​The Future Is Idiot-Proof](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-future-is-idiot-proof)
- [Existential Robot Fuck-tard](https://www.velovanity.com/home/existential-robot-fuck-tard)
- [Balloon Animals & The Big Lie](https://www.velovanity.com/home/balloon-animals-the-big-lie)
- [The First Car to Hit a Cyclist](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-first-car-to-hit-a-cyclist)
- [Left Handed -- Leftists & Leftovers](https://www.velovanity.com/home/left-handed-leftists-leftovers)
- [What Is Toothpaste Actually For?](https://www.velovanity.com/home/what-is-toothpaste-actually-for)
- [Here, Let Me Get That For You?](https://www.velovanity.com/home/here-let-me-get-that-for-you)
- [Ce n'est Pas Un Crayon:  Pornography & Photoshop](https://www.velovanity.com/home/ce-nest-pas-un-crayon-pornography-photoshop)
- [The Gestalt of Authenticity](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-gestalt-of-authenticity)
- [Winter's Logubrious McRib](https://www.velovanity.com/home/winters-logubrious-mcrib)
- [Tastes Like: Authenticity](https://www.velovanity.com/home/tastes-like-authenticity)
- [FUCK Fucking Brunch!](https://www.velovanity.com/home/fuck-fucking-brunch)
- [Sleeping Through Autocracy](https://www.velovanity.com/home/sleeping-through-autocracy)
- [Crashing.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/crashing)
- [About Your Wedding](https://www.velovanity.com/home/about-your-wedding)
- [I Would Totally Tap (e) That](https://www.velovanity.com/home/i-would-totally-tap-e-that)
- [Mortality Ain't Scary.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/mortality-aint-scary)
- [Cyclists Are Assholes Part 1](https://www.velovanity.com/home/cyclists-are-assholes-part-1)
- [Something Wicked This Way Comes](https://www.velovanity.com/home/something-wicked-this-way-comes)
- [MINORITY REPORT](https://www.velovanity.com/home/minority-report)
- [Going Postal](https://www.velovanity.com/home/going-postal)
- [A Ghost Is Bored](https://www.velovanity.com/home/a-ghost-is-bored)
- [Zero Jewels](https://www.velovanity.com/home/zero-jewels)
- [Farewell Jimmy Carter](https://www.velovanity.com/home/farewell-jimmy-carter)
- [ʃɪd o̜ːld ə.kwɛn.təns bi fər.ɡot](https://www.velovanity.com/home/d-old-ekwntens-bi-ferot)
- [The Time Traveller](https://www.velovanity.com/home/the-time-traveller)
- [My Fictional Winter](https://www.velovanity.com/home/my-fictional-winter)
- [A Farewell To Decency](https://www.velovanity.com/home/a-farewell-to-decency)
- [Myth Madness & Mantra](https://www.velovanity.com/home/myth-madness-mantra)
- [Adversity & The ASSet](https://www.velovanity.com/home/adversity-the-asset)
- [Homeopathic Bike Dr. Gustav Klein](https://www.velovanity.com/home/homeopathic-bike-dr-gustav-klein)
- [No More Food for Bomb-Sniffing Dogs](https://www.velovanity.com/home/no-more-food-for-bomb-sniffing-dogs)
- [LET THAT SHIT GO](https://www.velovanity.com/home/let-that-shit-go)
- [THEIR EYES WERE WATCHING NETFLIX](https://www.velovanity.com/home/their-eyes-were-watching-netflix)
- [Big Jelly Killed Etsy](https://www.velovanity.com/home/big-jelly-killed-etsy)
- [Coast is the New Black](https://www.velovanity.com/home/coast-is-the-new-black)
- [Aero Is BULLSHIT](https://www.velovanity.com/home/aero-is-bullshit)
- [FREEDOM TO INJURE ONESELF](https://www.velovanity.com/home/freedom-to-injure-oneself)
- [Origine Niçoise](https://www.velovanity.com/home/origine-nicoise)
- [AERO IS STILL BULLSHIT](https://www.velovanity.com/home/aero-is-still-bullshit)
- [SOME SHIT YOU WON'T NEED](https://www.velovanity.com/home/some-shit-you-wont-need)
- [La Bulle et Mon Mariage d'été Avec A.I.](https://www.velovanity.com/home/la-bulle-et-mon-mariage-dete-avec-ai)
- [Galon d' Or -- Focaccia, Fracture, Fuck-It!](https://www.velovanity.com/home/galon-d-or-focaccia-fracture-fuck-it)